journal.

PG: I get a 100 because I sat through My Fair Lady...never has been a favorite of mine. Can respect it and all... but so not my thing. Musicals in general have never really been my thing, but I don't particularity like the music in this one and Eliza is annoying. Whatever. It is what it is.

Journaling is such a pain in the ass. I'm editing my film and recording on my NEW FLIP! woot. Ok, this is all I'm writing, bye :]

My brother goes for surgery tomorrow.

PG: 100, because i found out i need to be more financially responsible. uhm... we did college stuff and watched my fair lady again and we still didn't finish it.

today wasn't too eventful. we watched my fair lady and continued with the college folders. i had to go to peer mediation today because this kid is a giant, discriminatory tool. oh, and everyone on my bus (including some openly gay students) are LIVID with moryiah's "article" in the newspaper. yay for the up coming rebuttals.

PG: Today I deserve a 100 because we watched My Fair Lady and I got it. Also, as the freshman were crying and texting me about what happened today, I was a good senior and talked them thorough it.

Today was the first time you crushed the freshman. I feel bad because I know how much it sucks, but then again I don't because I know how helpful it is. i had a nice, long talk with Kesley on the way home and explained to her the whole "life style vs. hobby" thing. The reason I'm so protective and ready to help the freshies is because I didn't have seniors who could do that for me. They were all good people, but on a professional level I only learned what NOT to do from them. I'm hoping I can teach them enough that they reach their freshman some of the things I've taught them.

The 25 Days of Christmas Starts Tonight!

...and I'm missing it, thank you, college.

PG: Today I deserve a 100 because I actually taught the freshman how to do things before I had them do them. Javi, Hopey, and I taught Michelle, John, and Jessica the correct and safe way to re-construct the orchestra pit. I also taught the freshman how to paint the right way and how to care for paint the right way. Yay me for attempting to spare our materials.

Today was so effing frustrating. If you don't know how to do something, have someone teach you. Just because you're a "senior" doesn't mean you know everything. Swallow your pride and ask for some help. I ask Dan and Matt for help like, everyday when it comes to tech because they could kick my ass at it everyday of the week. But at least I try. Just because I was an actor for the majority of my time here is not an excuse for me to not know how to paint the correct way or to not know how to hang a light or to not know how to put the orchestra pit back together. It's annoying when you're a no-it-all... like Matt. But at least he can back up 90% of what he says he knows about. If you have nothing to back it up with, please, do us all a favor and sit the fuck down and remove yourself from the teaching side of the senior class. And I totally understand that some of the seniors have not been here for as long as the others. I'm totally aware that some of us have the upper hand... but if you're going to be "a senior" act like one. And another thing that bothers me? People incapable of making a decision. Like for real? Why do you need to run to me every time you need to decide something? YOU'RE A FUCKING SENIOR. MAKE A DECISION. Some of the freshman can make better decisions and HAVE made decisions more than certain seniors have... it's sad. It's really sad. I guess my point is regardless of your position in the senior class, it's never too late to learn something. We all, as a whole, learn new things from each other everyday, despite the fact that we all almost have different areas of study. Don't try and play top dog if you can't. And don't boss freshman around when you have no idea what you're doing.

November 12, 2009.

PG: Today I deserve a 100 because Phil said that my monologue was "performance ready", and i was free to play with it. That made me really excited. It's always nice to hear nice things after you out your entire being on the line. Today is my brother's 12th birthday. That should count for something, right? What else did I do today... I'm pretty sure I got a 100 on my vocab test. I only have 3 marking periods of high school left!

So, Phil asked use to write a paragraph to bring in for tomorrow about our experiences this week and what we want out of tomorrow. So this paragraph will also serve as my blog.

One of my favorite things that Ms. Aladren does for us is bring in guest artists who have different methods than what we're used to. For four years I've been trained in Meisner and have touched on Adler, Stanislavski, and methods from the Atlantic Theatre Company. What I love most about being exposed to all these different techinques is mixing and matching what works for me and tossing what doesn't. This week I was exposed to some of the techniques of Michael Checkhov for the first time and was excited to add this to my list of mix and match.

The biggest probelm I've always had with monologues and audtions is a sense of place. I knew where I was but I didn't see and feel where I was. I didn't really start understanding character development until recently. Over the past week i have been able to make character development and character body organic. I wasn't sitting there thinking like "ok, I want her to walk funny". I learned that I had a lot of pre-conceived notions about my character due to my enviornment. that doesn't mean you're judging them, but rather your making them look a certain way to fit what you think would fit in the enviornment. i have a problem with that because apparently, i think like a director. i automatically thought, "ok, I'm in a crazy house. cold, constricted". like, i know my characters lonley and what not, but i was forgetting all about who the character was to make it look like she belonged in the enviornment. i kept forgetting this girl got sent there for lighting someones hair on fire and she's totally chill. i don't know, but something just clicked.

The techinques that helped me through this what was the "collapseable set" and sight lines. I now see where I am, rather than just know. Interacting with the differnt objects in my set that mean something to me help spark character memories. Tomorrow, I hope to continue achieving a good sense of my enviorment and having a really good, solid, deep moment before. I want to play around with this charcter more and see what I can do with my prop.

November 11, 2009.

PG: i get a 100 today because i worked on my monologue. i also finished (pretty much) my showcase book... (i now hate copy and fucking paste. how tedious.) and wrote my review. good stuff. i feel like i;\'m really getting somewhere with Van's Sister. I like her ALOT.

So, today is the first time i felt like my imaginary partner was actually effecting me. i felt like i was being watched from every corner. i felt so weak? this is the first time i actually feel like i chose a good monologue when i was done performing it. she's so different from me, but i know who she is talking to. i can relate. i've been there. i am there. i still talk to this guy, i still see him, he's still in my life. i think that combine with Phil's over all awesomeness is really helping me out.

November 10, 2009.

Participation Grade: I deserve a 100 today because for the first time ever (unfortunately, you missed it :[) I actually let a feeling build up. Instead of going from 0-100 in like, .5 seconds, it actually grew. And I felt it, I didn't want to push it. It was so satisfying.

Today, I worked Van's Sister from Dog Sees God. It felt amazing. I love taking what I've learned and applying it. Finally knowing a bunch of techniques and having them at my disposal and mixing and matching comes in handy. Being Meisner trained enables my truth. Taking Checkov and applying it to my monologue really gives me a sense of place. And I've always had a problem with that. I never see where I am. This has helped me IMMENSELY. Practical As Ifs are still my BFFS. I also really knew who I was talking to. It's like mixing and matching to get something beautiful.

maybe we should play the lottery?

participation grade: 100. because today went splendidly. it's so cool to learn new techniques because i can apply it to the old ones and see what i get. totally excited for the week.

so Phil is super cool. totally chill, i want to see him perform! he's teaching us Chekhov. I've heard of this method, but I'm not familiar with it, so I'm super stoked to be learning it. i love the fact that we learn meisner, i think it's the most efficient ways to train a young actor. it strips you down, it makes you truthful. but i think one of the best things you have ever done for us outside meisner training is bringing in guests artists who were trained differently. like when Atlantic came last year, i learned so much of what i learned from them for midsummer. the practical as if became my best friend. the Chekhov method or at least what Phil started us out with today has a lot to do with developing character thorough your environment. i didn't really start understanding character development until recently, so this was a nice way to start off after a break. today's learning's made character development do organic. like, i wasn't sitting there thinking like "ok, i want her to walk funny". you also learn that you have a lot of pre-conceived notions about your character due to your enviornment. that doesn't mean you're judging them, but rather your making them look a certain way to fit what you think would fit in the enviornment. i have a problem with that because apparently, i think like a director. i automatically thought, "ok, I'm in a crazy house. cold, constricted". like, i know my characters lonley and what not, but i was forgetting all about who the character was to make it look like she belonged in the enviornment. i kept forgetting this girl got sent there for lighting someones hair on fire and she's totally chill. i don't know, but something just clicked. this sounds so bad but I'm so excited you'll be absent all week :] this is such an experience that will definitely help me acting wise, but i know it will help me in my career as a director and filmmaker.

we meet again.

so i haven't done one of these in a while, i just finished a thesis paper on why beowulf is sexist, good shit, good shit.
PG: today i deserve a 100 because i helped finish the marketing plan, and although i was absent for most of the freshman periods, i was off bettering my pre-calc skilllllzzzzz with ms. vaksman, the best math teacher on the planet.

6 characters, wow. it's been a while. is it odd that i'm finding it hard to actually get into this one? i'm kinda sorta lost, so i started back from the beginning. i think it's because today has just been an off day in general. the only thing that i've been able to get today was the pre-calc stuff, so i think i'm just going to write about that. honestly i think if i write about anything else, it's going to sound like poop. now i'm scared to read that thesis paper. anyways, in pre calc we're working with domains and ranges of functions. so if we take a problem like x+6 over x-4 we can establish the domain and what not. first, we're given possible integers to see if these could appear in the graph. you just plug the corresponding integer for x. for domain you would set the denominator equal to zero, unless you had a picture, you would just pick the biggest and smallest x's on the graph. make sense? and the same thing with range, the biggest and smallest y's on the graph. then you find the intercepts. if you want to find the x intercept you set the whole equation equal to 0, but really you only have to work with the numerator, and the y intercept you just make every x in the problem 0 and solve. and sometimes we set the f(x) equal to another number, and them you set the whole equation equal to that number. i'm actually really staring to get this. it it weird that this is my journal entry? can you show this is ms. vaksman? i want her to know i'm trying and that today during 7th period something just clicked with me. i really appreciate all her help, like mad woah. wow. i never thought i would be in a pre calc class, like ever.

6 characters... so in act 2, when the characters are acting, are they actually acting out their life story, because i know that's what they're fighting about, i think. oh my god. i need to read this again on the bus in the morning. i will get back to you. at least something made sense today.

i don't have to do my journals but heres my participation grade:

PG:100. today i got my essays ripped to pieces and i know that it will help me a lot. it's like meisner with essays! and then we talked about modernism.. i feel so smart around the freshman because i actually get what we're talking about! but then i feel like crying again once 8th period rolls around because we start on essays again. but i did stay after for my first read of bolero today :]

<3

Pg: 100 because i stayed after.
no journals because i stayed after :)

I just took the most awesome Facebook quiz.

PG: Today I deserve a 100 because I didn't go to gym to audition for the Mainstage... and I just wanted to say thank you for that thing that we talked about today. I don't know if I'm officially aloud to talk about anything yet and since my blog is the most viewed one on the internet I figured I'd be as private as possible. But seriously, I can't loose with either option, although my love for one option is way higher than the other but there really isn't anything I can do about that is there? You made me feel speacial :] ok I'm done being vanialla. But I named my documentary SALT today: the ocean has salt, tears have salt, salt is bitter.. I have a bit of symbolism going on here. I'm also deciding on concessions for Giant Dinosaur. This was a good day.

boo.

PG: 100. Today i deserve a 100 because i understood 6 characters. also, my essay got ripped a new yet very effective asshole. this goes to show you that my "college prep english class: for the past two years has been nothing but a joke. you can only teach yourself so much. thanks, ebvt. anyways, i'm not gunna blog about 6 characters today.

I JUST FOUND OUT HAYLEY IS MAKING CUPCAKES!

SCORRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEE!
PG: Today I deserve a 100 because I addressed my inner conflict and did something about it. Also, I felt like shit and still attempted View Points. I understand why it is effective, but it ALWAYS makes me sooooo tired. We addressed some scheduling and showcase problems. I'm feeling the pressure.

I started reading "6 Characters"... why is there so many fucking stage directions?! It reminds me of Death of A Salesman in the sense that the stage directions are never ending. But it also vaguely reminds me of Greek Theatre. Oh! and from last year with the latzis and stuff. I totally spelled that wrong. Anyway, since I don't technically have to do this, I'm gunna go now and study for my SATs.

-today I did my Thesis.
-continued to edit my essay that I put on Google Docs.

PG: today i deserve a 100 because i found out the right way to do my resume. i don't even know if i'm spelling that right. i swear i'm getting sick. there's something going around shop for sure, anyways, what i did today to deserve a 100. we did meisner with the babies, and i did awesome cartwheels. our freshman give me stuff to work off, which is good. we got good ones this year! actually, for the past couple years, they've all been good.

i don't have to journal because i stayed after today :)

it's been a while.

PG: 100. today i deserved a 100 because i read for and decided to be cast in the mainstage. i'm super excited because although it's not my major anymore, i still love to act. i really love the two character's i auditioned for. Vicki and Barbara are two such different character's and no matter which one i get a i have a few tricks up my sleeve :)

Journals: i satyed after school today for my Bolero Concept Metting, so hopefull when you stay after you don't have to do journals... i hope this rule is still in effect. please let me know it it's not so i can make it up :)

boo.

PG: 100% Today I deserve a 100 because I read Bolero twice and I started my director's book. I re-read Dog See's God because the monologue that I am choosing is from there. I also read Be Aggressive. Three plays in one day, not to shabby if I do say so myself. We did View Points today and it made me want to go to sleep so bad. I deserve a 100 for staying awake.. that's the real reason a deserve a 100.

After reading Bolero to myself and out loud about 4 times I definitely caught a few very suspicious things that made me way more excited that before to direct it. I was always excited, don't get me wrong... but I just saw some much that I could do with it! I'm have a concept meeting on the 28Th and I'm amped for that. I started some rough set and costumes designs with Scarlett today and Travis yesterday. I got some really awesome pictures online... now I need the measurements of the stage and things will be a lot easier. I don't want to put any of my ideas on here, because of course, my brilliance will cause people to want to copy me. I'm such an ass... but seriously. This concept meeting has got me totally excited and working my ass off.

I don't have a good Title for this.

Participation Grade: 100% Today I deserve a 100 because I showed up and did what I had to. It was a half-day, so things were pretty easy. We did the whole preparing for Parent's Night thing and made our goals and wrote the notes to our parents. I wonder what my goals were Freshman Year... because I really don't have the slightest clue that they would be. I was reading some of the freshman's goals... it was cute. It was so weird writing that one of my goals this year was to get into college, I don't feel this old. All the other seniors before me always seemed so much older.

Journaling: I read two plays today: Refuge by Jessica Goldberg and Bolero by David Ives. I think I spelled that wrong and I'm too lazy to go and check. Refuge completely killed my mood. I feel so bad for Amy, she's so miserable, you can just tell. Oh! side not, I also read God See's God on the bus ride home while everyone else was playing an intense game of Truth or Dare. But yeah, 3 plays in less than 7 hours, I'ma beast. I started getting some ideas for my Senior Showcase. I kept seeing everything as being very vertical and very bland, I have an explanation for this though, and I'll be starting my directors book soon. I need help with that.

Participation Grade: 100%
i guess today is the day that i can get a 100 for being pretty and having awesome hair? maybe. i took some pretty beast headshots. and i taught the headshots about "connecting with the camera" and all that good stuff and headtshots. they asked me a lot of questions, i feel like i answered them pretty well.

I re-read Jumbo by Dan and i started getting some ideas about how it would be staged and such. because it is a play that takes place i envisioned a beach house on the beach (a house kind of like August) with the front part of it open so we could see into it. The house itself is very bare, but is painted like sea foam green and light blues and yellows. this creates a very serene feeling that is a good contrast to the two main characters, hank and andrew. this also fits nice for the climax, which is anything but calm. that's all i have so far, and i hope it makes sense.

Blahhhh.

Participation Grade: 100. Today, I deserve a 100 because I did an ok job at 2 minutes of reality. I'd like to think that I've come pretty far since freshman year. I'll admit when I first entered I was running on pure adrenaline, but eventually I relaxed into it. I've finally become somewhat comfortable. It's about time I guess?

As for journaling, I just read a new play by Dan enetitled "JUMBO" and everyone should go read it. I was staging this the entire time I was reading it, mostly because the main character's name is Hank. He's this 20 something year old guy who dropped out of college. Somewhat witty, but a thinker. Overall good guy. I have a friend named Hank is who exactly what I just listed. It was almost eerie. Like, I want to talk about what this was all about but I don't want to give anything awway because I want you to read it. Other than that I just sent my character monologue, and I've continued to re-read "Doll's House". Oh, funny thing. Actually, not too funny, but reavelnt. Today in my english class Mrs. Meagher-Diello taught us the difference between things that should be put in quotations and things that should be underlined and I just realized that I did something wrong. I should have written A Doll's House and it should have been underlined but I can't figure out how to do that on here. Like, big things get an uinderline like titles and stuff like that, and subtitles get the quotations. See what a REAL english class can teach you! Other than that, shop was pretty chill. Lacey stopped by, she's enjoying MG which is nice... not that I didn't already know that. Ok, my fingers hurt. Buh-Bye.

September the Sixteenth.

Participation Grade: 100.
Today I deserve a 100 because Aladren said that I was her favorite student, aside from Javi, and I feel that that alone is a huge accomplishment (Haha). But really, I taught freshman as best as I could how to use a ladder, and I feel that I helped some of them. Also, after making my whole "It's ok to say no if you're scared" speech, I feel that a lot of them felt more comfortable admitting their issues with the ladders and I feel like I helped them. I also wore sneakers, which usually does not happen AND we talked about Midsummer and it brought back a lot of memories :( I can't believe I'm a senior!

As for journals, I started re-reading "A Doll's House", just to see if I hadn't caught somethings the first time around... and everything seems to be the same... so I think I'm going to re-read it again, just to be safe. I'm going to write a paper about it, so I want to make sure I'm well informed. I know I want my thesis to have something to do with feminism and the movement from Romanticism to Realism and how this play influenced it. Glenn just called me, random. Haha. Random. We're talking on the phone now and it's interupting my journal time. I think I'm going to start reading "A Sense of Direction" again, I think it will help me a lot. Ok, I'm siging off.

I've been up since 5AM and I'm really tired.

Participation Grade: 100%
today i deserve a 100 because although you (ms. aladren) may have thought that my attempts at moderating that debate were futile, i would like to think that towards the i didn't do too poorly. it's really interesting what the freshman think and it's nice to see them opening up and some of them not afraid to share their opinions. they seem so malleable that i'm almost afraid to say somethings because i don't want them getting the wrong idea. i hope that my points made some sense today and that they took something away from that discussion. i feel like i'm mentoring.

SHOULD ART ALWAYS SHOW THE GOOD TRIUMPHING OVER THE EVIL?
no. i think that art should show whatever the outcome is as is, whether it be good or evil. yes, stories do have happy endings, but they have dismal ones as well, that shouldn't be ignored because they are "good" or "evil". no doubt more stories leave you with a thread of hope at the end of a dark situation, but should we only limit endings to just that? i don't think so. i think today in class this debate turned into "do bad endings have hope in them" or "even though the ending is seemingly bad, there is still hope".. which is why i posed the "what is good and what is bad" question. but, never-the-less, the questions still asks: should only good be aloud to win in the end? and i think not, because, plainly, in real life situations, good does not always win. does this mean that you have no hope left? no. it just means the the outcomes of that situation were not good for you (aka, bad) but you still have hope left. the presence of hope had nothing to do with the question, but the debate was good anways.

SHOULD ART BE PRESENTED IF IT WILL OFFEND CERTAIN MORALS OR BELIEFS HELD BY SOCIETY?
yes. education is key. dan and i had very close opinions in this: everything should have a reason. like, language. like, take "out lady of 121st street", a play set in a very urban environment. the language is pretty disgusting if you just skim through it, but when you actually read it read it, something more is revealed. the people in this play are uneducated ghetto people (and not to say that ghetto people are uneducated, but these people are). they were never taught the right way to communicate or how to express themselves, so they resort to petty name calling or throwing curse words around as fillers for words that they don't know. sure, the language probably offend lots of people, but it shouldn't be aloud to be performed or published because it has relevance. it sheds light on the uneducated people in the world. i know after reading that play i started to clean up my vocabulary. it just wasn't throwing around the word "fuck" for fun, it had a purpose, and i think that the goal was reached.

A DOLL'S HOUSE:
so i just finished it, and that door slam is so satisfying. i kind of suspected that this was going to happen. you told us that this was one of the first feminist plays, so i figured she either killed him or left him.. but i didn't think nora could murder someone so i opted for the second one. but damn, the entire time i was just like.. wow. look at everything that she's been keeping insider of her. she acknowledges that she has no idea what the world is, but she's willing to find out. she admits that she has no education, but she wants one. ugh! i was so happy for her. i felt for her. i was so proud of nora. i need to see this play. i can see why this would start riots, but i'm so happy it was written. this needed to be written because it started such a powerful movement. girl power. go me. go nora!


as a side note: while doing college applications today, i came across a problem. alot of them don't have the fall of 2010 application on line yet. CalArts comes out at the end of september, but we'll talk tomorrow.

i have finally surrendered.

i hate blogging. i think i have a vendetta against it. but here you go, aladren. you've won this one. anyways... "a doll's house" is going surprisingly well. i really do not like torevald at all.. like, i just want to hit him with something heavy and blunt. he's so forkin' controlling. and dr. rank and nora have totally "been gettin' it on" btdubbs. i'm not even acting in this and just by reading it i could feel the sexual tension between the two of them, like mad woah. i really want to find out why this is considered to be one of the first feminist plays.. actually. i know why. you can tell, as i mentioned in my last entery that was not a blog, that nora is totally using her ditzyness as a way to "cheat the system" like paris hilton. that shows a woman in power, so that's always a plus. go nora. that dr. rank is tricky though... it was tough reading his parts becuase he's dying. i kept imagingng my aunt's boyfriend who passed not even a week ago from cancer playing him. i guess it's the whole illness thing. was that bitchy? i don't think it was. OH! and then dr. rank like admits to loving nora... which i totally called. i read this going "hmm.. i bet her has the hots for nora" and he so did. and i'm so happy he did. not because i want to break up nora and torevald's marriage or anything, i just really wanted to be right. blogblogblog. blog. ok, whatever. i think i'll finish this play by tomorrow. i'm almost done with the 2nd act, so i'm in pretty good shape. yay being a senior who knows how to read and understand plays! go me! go katelin!

ok. so i never gave my participation grade yesterday: 100.
i deserve a 100 for Septmeber 8, 2009 for three reasons:
1) because i am awesome and i have amazing hair.
2) we started reading a doll's house, and i read nora. and alothough that part is no where, and i mean not even remotly close to my range, i'd like to think oi banged it out pretty well... ok. i lied. it was horrible but i didn't give up! i just did it. and i think that says alot about me as a person. not really, but i still read and participated in class and that should count for something.
3) i started my auto-biographical college essay and i came to the conclusion that i have no idea what i'm doing. but i'm assuming that feeling is healthy becuase if i did know what i was doing, i would already be in college. that realization is a very goo reason to have a 100.

september 9, 2009 participation grade. 100.
today, i get a 100 because i am smart enough to give myself one. why would you not give yourself a 100? that's like finding $10 dollars in your pant's pocket, knowing that you are going out to lunch and plan on buying something for exactly $10 and leaving the money in your pocket. maybe it isn't anything like that but i thought it was a good anology. but other than giving myself a 100 and being awesome the other seniors and i discussed the showcase alot, i helped dan with "don't cut class" and such. go life.